OPLDatabaseFile p<101 Reasons Why the Chicken Crossed the Road According to...2Version: 98.1 - Matthew Smith - asleep@terminal.cz Douglas Adams Forty-Two. Jane AustenBecause it is a truth universally acknowledged that a single chicken, being possessed of a good fortune and presented with a good road, must be desirous of crossing.& AristotleTo actualise its potential.KNeil Armstrong;One small step for chickenkind, one giant leap for poultry.~Paul AtreidiesnWhat name have you for the chicken shaped stain upon your road? That shall be the name that you shall call me!WLord Baden-PowellDBecause as a Chicken Scout, it needed the Road-Crossing Merit Badge. BaldrickIt had a cunning plan. Clive BarkerHe was drawn to the road, and he didn't so much cross the road as the road crossed him. And once across, the chicken entered into a frightening void, filled only with the screams of a thousand agonized souls. The hands of doom reached out of the blackness, strangling the chicken, smothering him, suffocating him. He could not escape, as no one who crosses the road can escape. He was now a prisoner of the Cenobytes, doomed to an eternity of pain.% Roseanne BarrUrrrrrp. What chicken?_&Lavrenti Beria, former head of the KGB7This is a State Secret - we have informants everywhere. Bill The Cat Ack. Thpppbt.CBuddha;If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.5 Rhett Butler'Frankly my dear, it didn't give a damn!uC3POoSir, according to my calculations, the odds of a chicken successfully navigating a road are 3,750 to 1 against.$CaesarIt came, it saw, it crossed.!CandideTo cultivate its garden.Raymond ChandlerAcross these mean streets a chicken must go who is not himself mean, who is neither tarnished nor afraid. He is the hero; he is everything. He must be a complete chicken and a common chicken and yet an unusual chicken. He must be, to use a rather weathered phrase, a chicken of honour - by instinct, by inevitability, without thought of it, and certainly without saying it. He must be the best chicken in his world and a good enough chicken for any world.V The ChickenII am crossing the road to block traffic as a protest against ... (thump).% Noam ChomskyTo manufacture consent. John Cleese~This isn't a chicken license, you know! It's a dog license with the word Dog crossed out and Chicken written in in crayon.fManagment ConsultantDeregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening it's dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Managment Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking it's physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Interation Model (PIM) helped the chicken use it's skills, methadologies, knowledge capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of it's overall strategy within a Program Managment framework. Managment Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analyst and best chickens along with Managment consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poltry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused and built upon a consistent, clear and unified market message and alligned with the chicken's mission, vision and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration soluPtion. Managment Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.Jacques Ives CousteauZee cheecken, unaware of zee dangare beehind heem, crosses zee street. Weezout warning, zee Porsche strikes, and zee balance of zee nature ees maintained.8Aleister Crowley&Because it was its True Will to do so. Salvador Dali The Fish.FDarwin>It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.KRene Descartes;It had sufficient reason to believe it was dreaming anyway.5Emily Dickinson$Because it could not stop for death.E.T. Chicken, phone home.U Wyatt EarpIWell, chicken, are you gonna do something, or just stand there and bleed?6Eeyore.If it did. Which I doubt. Not that it matters.yAlbert EinsteinhWhether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends on your frame of reference.H T.S. Eliot